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Since i was in school i thought the best way to avoid trouble is to be by myself
As pathetic as it sounds, it's very true. It was the only way i was able to stop being bullied. Being by myself made me an easy target i suppose but because of that i was
able to blend into the background, however, that made it hard to make friends. I've been by myself for a long time and it just feels "normal" so i never really thought about it

When i first mustered up the courage to post something online on deviant art(after just having an account and just looking for a couple of years) was really nervous tbh, but some
welcomed me to the "community". I wasn't expecting that but felt really nice. I don't think i ever really thanked every one for welcoming me and i apologize for not saying it sooner
After being here for a year (or 2 i think?) i was happy I made progress in a way, even though sometimes(if not all the time) i feel like im never close

But it seems even online, im constantly reminded, i'll be by myself regardless of what i do
Just because you've chatted with someone, doesn't mean they like you or even care
Just because you shared something with them, doesn't mean you're close or they understand
Just because you say "hello" or "goodbye", doesn't mean they'll say it back

I was welcomed when i first came here, but it seems once that's done it becomes..dry
I was really excited to meet/chat with some of the artist i looked up too, only to find out they didn't care how much because i wasn't a "top artist"
I've lost respect for some artist i looked up to, wondering why they only speak to one another depending on their skill. Never understood that but that's how it is i suppose
I'm sure at some point they started out the same way i did and everyone else, so i really don't understand why some can be like that
Biggest mistake you can do, is ask them for advice. it seems some don't have a "nice" way of saying they can't. I understand that not every artist is a teacher, but i don't think it would hurt to be a bit humble and consider other's feelings

Even for a little while I manged to play with some people, even hear their voice, but like everything else, it ended soon and i ended up back where i was
I never thought a bad thing about being by myself and it never hurt me, but now i think i understand the feeling when one is left behind. im not sure how to put it but it feels "heavy" i think
im not sure if that's a bad feeling though. just what it feels like

Im sorry if it sounds like im being odd. Suppose that's what happens when you're by yourself for several years. Don't get me wrong, i have family, but we don't communicate much after my mother died years
Still, it's nice to see there are others who like this kind of work, but i have to face facts(as much as it sucks) 
Some here have friends online that they chat with everyday, it wouldn't be right of me getting in the way of that, even if it makes me feel alone again 

If you made it here, Thank you for taking the time and sorry for boring you ^^;
Sometimes writing things down can put you at ease a bit and hope i didn't weird anyone out in the process
Im probably the only one who likes this kind of stuff here on DA
but just watched a video that didn't know existed till now. Glad i came across it

Wish i could animate like this

I still play A TON of overwatch
Not sure how i have time for drawing anything considering i work full time and play video games :P

Anywho, found this Awesome "Play of the Game" Animated video by TwistedGrimTv. XD

So I think im gonna clean a few things out and toss them in "scraps"
I might come back to them, I might not :P but i want to clean some out

Go take a look if ya like
I might put more there
just realized "scraps" don't show in notifications even if you're "watching"
didn't notice that :P
I'd like to thank everyone who usually showed up to my streams 
even if it was for a little while. I really do appreciate it^^

But lately it's been beating my morale down(not sure..maybe the planets are aligned!)
I tried mornings, afternoons, and nights. I tried to see when most people have time to be online
but turns out it's not the time that matters. It's who's streaming

I can recall a moment when I was able to get 2 or 3 people to show up(was pretty happy) only to leave when when  artist like ayanamifan or pokkuti started
I know, that's just how it is, but it hurt a bit
Multi streaming seemed like fun too, but it just let me know that people where there for the other person. And when that artist left so did everyone else
Again, I know, that just how it is, but it still hurt a bit

Please, i hope you guys don't think im being selfish or whiny. I know that artist Like Aya, pokkuti, gettar, redsilver, wobbleblot, and ritualist (and alot of other good artist) have more than earned such an audience^^
Just wish i could too not good at rambling on about feelings and stuff(so cheesy). I know you guys have better things to do but thanks for listening
Thanks sooo much again guys for the faves, watches, and viewsThanks for everything! 
But Im just gonna stop with streaming and uploading on DA for a long while
before i do that though, I have to finish a birthday gift 

Thanks everyone^^
While i was checking my phone app on DA I realized i had a core membership^^
Whoever you are mystery man/girl you have my thanks!

And as for commissions
Im waiting on a response from paypal that I haven't gotten yet but it seems like I manged to set things up..maybe?
Im in no rush, but i was thinking to start off with limits since I have a full time job

So i was thinking something like:
I'll open only a few spots(4 or 5) 
It's limited to only 1 character and they will only be inked so im thinking $15 
You've seen my gallery so you know what to expect from me( or lack :P)

So that's the idea. Not sure when i'll start but hopefully it'll be sometime soon
if anyone has any tips(since it'll be my first time) I would appreciate it
So I'm not too sure but had an idea for some people to win a request. Not sure if they're fair but it's just an idea.

One was beating me on Street fighter 5 which would probably be easy, but doesn't seem fair since some people either don't want to get it or can't afford

The other is, since there isn't a lot of juri muscle artwork out there, I was thinking something like you guys drawing a sketch of her in a funny situation. But not sure if that would work either.

And the winners would be something like
1place: colored request
2 place: inked request
3 place: sketched request

Anywhoo, that's my idea but what do u guys think? Holding off till I get a better idea seems like a good option too
soooo just a simple question
where is the "submit artwork" button on furaffinity. I go to my page but I see no way of putting artwork. I go to my account can't do it there either
And I check my gallery for it and there's nothing either

I wanted to upload something there just to be safe, but looks like im gonna have to wait till I find that damn button :P
I haven't looked up these guys in while
Take a listen and watch if you guys have the time^^

Soooo..I just realized how much I spent on copic so im just gonna wait to color my drawings when I get that pesky tablet lol
I hope you guys don't mind if I just post my next few drawings in pencil. Once I have the power to give them color, I'll see if I can make them shine
However, I hear it's a bit of a learning curve

this is the tablet im going for:…
I actually wanted this 3 years ago, but decided I should wait(even though I had enough)

Now then, I have some questions about this so hope you guys can answer
1. Do drawing tablets come with their own software to draw on? If yes, Should I just stick with that?
                                                                                             If no, any suggestions on a cheap but good one?
2. is it better to sketch drawing on paper and then use tablet to finish or better to start on tablet?(or does this just depend on the person?)

I might have more questions later on, but if there's anything important I should know about drawing tablets let me know

So hopefully I'll get one early next month( I really hope I can)
Until then you'll be left COLORLESSS!Onionhead falling - Onion head 
Looks like Deviantart doesn't accept animation in AVI
Which is a total bummer. I used MonkeyJam since my animation is pencil drawn

I'm able to see it animated so that's something but I wanted to upload it too
looks like I won't be able to put it up unless there's something else like MonkeyJam(free I mean) that I can use to turn it into a animated file that's accepted by DeviantArt

Ill look around for something
but I won't get my hopes up again just incasesigh 
I've been working on a little animation but not sure how to upload it.
It's nothing great but it's my first time trying to animate something and would like to put it up if possible. does involve female muscle so if you don't like the idea then just keep moving, but like i said: nothing great

The thing is I use the scanner on my printer to upload my little pieces of work so what i did is i scanned the pages and then copied and pasted 3 of each image(to make it move a little smoother)
Now..yes it is jpeg so what i did (because i just wanted to see the images move quick enough so it would look animated) is I used Windows Photo Viewer and held the left or right key to see the images move fast enough to where it looks animated. THIS was just something i tried cuz i wanted to see it move

However i have no idea how i can upload this on deviantart
i don't have any programs on my computer for animation or anything so not sure if i need something like that

If anyone has any ideas let me know on the comments

I've been watching "Death Parade" and the theme song is so damn catchy I just can't help it.
If you guys have time, take a listen to the band..[link]. it's not really my type of genre, but it picks me up when I'm feeling a little down
If anyone hasn't heard yet, Wakfu, the animated work of art that only aired in France is now on the verge of having Season 1 English Dubbed!!(with an option for French audio and subtitles if you prefer). My French isn't really good so I had a hard time understanding the characters and their situation. Yet, that fact couldn't keep me from watching this wonderful work of art. The animation is fluid and amazing. I didn't need to understand the words from the characters to know when they were being funny, brave, sad, or even in love. For those of you who are not familiar with Wakfu, it doesn't hurt to take a look and see for yourself. Just go to, search Wakfu and play the little video trailer on their kickstarter homepage. You even get some special goodies if you decide to contribute. Spread the word! and Thank you.

I came across this youtube video and...apparently, this is the noise a fox…

Kind of funny(weird) if you ask me. Very catchy.

Get Ready to ROCK on…

is that Axl Low and I-NO I bet your ass it is.

So I'm not sure how to explain this, but this is a game that is trying to make something new out of  JRPG games. I'm not very good at explaining these kind of things. so please check out this… and check out there videos too. These guys mean business and are very passionate about this project and could use your support. Please read through their article and watch their videos before criticizing. They are serious about this.

When you go to the link, on the right you should see the option of pledges you could consider being part of and some rewards to go along with it if you choose to do so. It should also show the number of "backers" that contributed to the this project.

All I can do is spread the word. The rest is up to you.


I just can't get enough of their unique music videos, but watching them doing live performances is even better.
don't you think so? Here's the…
Check the lead singer in the band "Stance Punks" going on a night stroll through the city.
Don't know why, but as crazy as he looks, I love this song to death! It keeps me happy! YAAAAHHHHH!!…
It seems that it's rare for anyone to enjoy music like this in america, but you guys should give a listen to there lates music video.
At least listen to it half way, you might like…. To give you an idea it's classical music with rock. Something like that.
It's unique...lets go with that.

I have to say, I miss the old singer for this band. He had a somewhat beastly voice, but I guess(within time)change tends to happen, right?